As I was going through my files, searching for my birth certificate (found!! :D) I found this piece that I wrote about my “why” or my purpose if you will. So I thought I’d share:
My why is because I am tired.
I am so sick and tired of doing the things I don’t want to do. Please don’t mistake this for laziness. I will do one million things I don’t want to do to get one million and one things that I want. But I am tired of trading my time, my days, my years …to survive. I want to be able to travel the world. Yes, aimlessly. But with the message of love. To change the hate and depression that is so rampant in this world. I love you. Yes, you. It is important to love and a 9-5 job that never gets me anywhere plants a deep seed of detest in my soul. I detest being told where to be and when to be there. I have my own heart, my own mind, and my own message of which to speak. If you tell me to be there …and I am there …then that is my decision, of my own accord. I am a limitless entity. I grow tired of having my fire extinguished by entities that want to use me for my time. I want something to call mine, my own. I own it. I made that. It would not be there if it weren’t for me. Why? Because I am tired. I am tired of working endlessly to die as something that will only be missed for a minute and the rain of the next day will wash away the small footprint that was left. I wish to leave a crater. Break away and break down the negativity to build up something enormous. Something that builds people up. I want someone else to look at it and say “I can do it!” Why? Because I am tired. I am tired of feeling myself getting older, but not any better. I am tired of working harder, yet not any richer. I am tired of being looked at as someone who can’t, who is barely holding themselves together. I am tired of being tired. I want to have the energy it requires to build a machine. I want to live a life people are envious of so they can ask me “How?” and I can show them how. Why? Because I am tired. I am done being tired. Why live a life not shooting for the stars? If you can see it, you should shoot for it. I am tired of robbing myself and the world of my potential. I have the heart and I have the tools and it is time to put them to work. It starts today. Why? Because I am tired. I am tired of being nothing. Don’t ever let someone tell you “You’re doing well!” when you know that you can do better. Don’t ever let someone tell you they’re proud and don’t be so hard on yourself when you know that you must be harder.
There’s a better life to live out there…and it’s just around the corner.
I just want to get fucking high. Look, I’m just tired, that’s all. I’m tired of waking up every morning and for every second of my day I’m beating endlessly against this seemingly impenetrable fortress of ignorance that all of society appears so intent on hunkering down within.
And I’m angry. I’m angry that no matter which way I turn there is corruption, greed, and self-serving behavior filtered through every fiber of society from the very top to the very bottom. I’m not trying to be Noble. I just want to enjoy life and do it in a way where there’s no fucked up shit going on in the background.
I’m angry that people treat investing like going to the grocery store where they’re just looking for the best deal for them and don’t know and certainly don’t seem to care how these corporations are manufacturing their products. Like Apple having claims of child labour and here’s another article…including Samsung and Sony. In this article it states that “Apple is not directly responsible” but that’s the point isn’t it? We aren’t ‘directly’ responsible as the consumer but purchasing the product is still fueling the demand which fuels the practice. So these companies are now running “rigorous audits” to ensure their raw materials aren’t getting sourced by underage labor – after getting caught for it. *initiate slow clap* And it’s not a surprise that these companies aren’t bothering to ask where the materials come from to make their devices. Why? Because the consumers don’t ask.
I’m angry that people are consuming cane sugar and are ignorant to the fact that children are working on sugar farms in mostly life-threatening hazardous conditions for $3.50 a day. Our drinking of Coca-Cola is supporting this. Coca-Cola is the largest purchaser of sugar in the world – yes, yes they are putting money towards removing children from the fields and putting them in school. But these companies aren’t taking the effort towards finding out where their products are coming from proactively and its because WE are not taking the effort as the consumer to find out where these products are coming from. If we did, they would. Because someone went out and found out and reported it and now people care. Now companies are doing something about it. But if we just keep consuming these things and remaining ignorant on an individual level eventually the corporations – who mirror our actions – will also forget about it. And then chop chop chop away goes the child at the sugar cane. Here’s another article.
I’m angry that we still use plastic bags in grocery stores in the U.S and Australia has reduced their plastic bag usage by 80%. I’m angry that it took so long for a hemp bill to get approved and now we can finally start working towards making packaging out of hemp instead of plastic. Did you know plastic is a byproduct of oil? On a sidenote about oil – The U.K has announced that by 2040 diesel and petrol will be BANNED. Ya. What are we doing over here again?
I hear people in India talking about the trash problem and completely missing the point. They say “Lets start a program to pickup the trash in India!” and then what? Put it in a big pile somewhere like we do in the U.S? We should be ABLE to throw our trash on the ground because everything we make comes from the earth so we should be able to return it to the earth. But being the genius little humans that we are we’ve managed to create products that don’t biodegrade for 450-1000 years and takes 1.5 million barrels of oil a year to produce our water bottles – just our water bottles – not to mention whats burned to transport them. Mom and Dad – please look at this one. Another source claims it takes 17 million barrels of oil. Whatever. Either way – it’s a lot. I’m not gonna even get into the fact that of how it takes 3 times the amount of water to make the bottled water.
Do you guys get it?
We need to wake up.
…don’t go back to sleep…
People are going back and forth
across the doorsill where the two worlds touch
…don’t go back to sleep…